A small moment called Pride
In 2005 I wasn't just a kid, I was a kid that looked like a MUCH younger kid. I was maybe 4 and a half feet short (1.39 meters)... My dad was running for rector of the National University of Costa Rica (UNA) and won, so he was to be sworn into office. And for some completely crazy and illogical reason he decided to ask me to play in front of the entire university faculty and public that would come to the inauguration event of him receiving his newly elected charge as rector.
I remember like it was yesterday. He came into one of my music lessons and asked my teacher if I could prepare a piece on xylophone to perform. I was almost sure that my teacher would not agree to it because there were only about 3 weeks to prepare and a presentation for those many people was nuts... Well, I was wrong, my teacher agreed and told my dad it would be not one, but TWO songs on xylophone with a pianist interpreting the song with me! WHAT?! Well yeah, that is what he decided. I would play a tango called "Argentinita" and a classic called "Sabre Dance". Both songs I had been learning but now I would have to perform with a pianist in front of who knew how many human eyes on me... "It does not matter what songs we perform" he said "what matters is the way you perform them. That is what truly impresses audiences of any size and musical knowledge".
People that my dad had talked to about me performing were not very convinced about him letting his minuscule kid play at an important day. But since it was My Dads Day, they could not do more than agree in a scared manner; thinking they knew not if I would or not be a decent musician. All I knew was that my dad, my mom and my teacher believe in me. I practiced for hours and hours and hours, with and without the pianist; my teacher would make me go outside the classroom and music school to walk around the building while singing the music to make sure I would have them engraved in my mind for the rest of my life and specifically for that performance.
When the day came I could feel people's whispers on my neck, hear their mental laughter as I got up on a stool to be able to reach the xylophone comfortably as I was too shot to reach on my own. My legs, arms and hands were shaking, my heart was racing out of my chest. I don't know if 5 or 10 thousand people were at the event... I felt double as many people there were, as each of there eyes counted as pressure against me. I am pretty sure my mom and dad were as scared and nervous as I was; only my teacher was completely still and confident (I have no idea how he kept his cool so well). Finally, as they announced my presentation was to begin and name the music pieces I was to perform, deafening silence settled around me.
I remember feeling the sweat in my hands dry as the presentation went on and me feel confident as soon as I began playing the first piece. By the time I got to the Sabre Dance by Khachaturian, I realized it was me, the xylophone and the pianist and No One else... I was of course playing the instrument with my hands, but my mind felt as if I was out by the music building singing the song out loud with my voice, just like my teacher had forced me to.
As soon as I struck the 9 final chords that Sabre Dance ends with, I looked up and saw everyone clap. My mother clearly had teary eyes... my teacher smiling (which I had NEVER seen him do before that day). Slowly but surely felt the shaking come back into my legs and arms as hundreds of butterflies filled the hole I had in my stomach.
Now look back at the picture of my dad in the beginning of this entry for a second...
It did not matter that I was shaking, it did not matter how tall or short I was...
Because that day I saw my dad smile like he had never done before
Because that moment of my life, that moment is called pride
Here's the Sabre Dance performed by the Berlin Philharmonic Orchestra:
